Surgery

Cut
Scratch
Scrape

I am afraid
It has spread
To all of her organs
Floating in her veins

It has taken her
Taken over her mind
She will never be the same
She will cease to be alive

"Well, maybe you were better when you were off your medication."

"What are you being, bipolar or something?"

"I am afraid you will have to make some changes to the rest of your life that you might find rather discomforting but it is only for the best. You will get through this, finding yourself a new you."

"You are just so..."

"What am I?" I ask.

"You can't even look inside yourself to see what is wrong with you? Maybe your head is really screwed on backwards..."

"No, I am trying. I really am."

Slap!

"Quit your bitching."

"I want to hang out."

"No. Do you think I like hearing this?"

"You used to like me once."

"No. I think you were just imagining it."

Just imagining it?
I pass by the stadium, hearing their roaring chant
I walk down the path, streetlamp blazing over my head
The frogs sing from the sidewalk
A black cobra lays in wait, tying it's body together round and little
My roommates laugh but I do not hear them
For all I know, they are in another universe
A fabrication made by my own mind
What is my mind?
Where is my mind?

"Please. Come walk with me. I just want to talk to you."

"I don't want you getting the wrong idea."

Wrong idea?
You are the only thing that makes sense in this universe
For reasons I do not yet understand

"I don't want you being so in love with me."

It's deeper than love
Something you cannot see
Something you do not know

I find myself gravitating towards you
My soul, my flame
I am nothing more than the gravel under your feet
But you
You are the limbs that attach my body
Thus being severed from you
I think I will never be the same again

You are the only thing that makes sense
You and your dreams
Your smile and your laugh
Your friendship and your touch
You don't get it
You could never get it

It is you
It has always been you
But the universe
But God himself does not understand
I will find myself beaten a million times before I am granted my access to you again
By then, I might be a different person
You might try to reach me and I will never see you
Because it beat my love out of me
That is what it did

But you
You are ever more real
Than anything I can see
For no one can replace you
In your uniqueness
In your kindness
And intellect

Nothing can take the effect of you away from my skin
Your burning touch lingering long after you have left
But you will leave
You have to leave
Just don't forget

From you comes pain
From you comes glory
You are my oblivion

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